Healing of a broken heart

It has been way to long, for some reason I just can't seem to keep up on here. There is just some words I need to get out some feelings I have kept to myself. This last December, I had missed my period. I didn't think anything of it. Well you see I'm on birth contorl. and that happens. But just in case I decided to take a pregnancy test, I got a faint positive.... One week later I miscarried. I'm DEVASTAED :"( I know I may not be ready, but it still is so hard. That would have been a child I could have for myself. Well I continued to bleed heavily and was in so much pain so I went into the hospital. they informed me that i had an Infection in my reporductive organs. I could have lost my fertility. All I want is to be a mother. I don't understand why this happening. I know God has a plan for me, and honsetly that is what keeps me going, Faith. And the love of my heavenly father. I'm trying my best to be content. But i find myself on my knees crying most nights. I also recieved a blessing of comfort. that indeed has comforted me. Some of you might be thinking why didn't I hear about this? Because I needed to come to accept it first. The only ones who knew was Garrett, my mother and I. It hurts so bad, but i know I will meet that lost baby someday. Just to know what I have always wanted was at my finger tips. was in my tummy :"( A beautiful life I made with my husband. And I don't know If I ever will be able to concive again. I can just only hope and pray. But please please God, I have done your work, I placed my birthdaughter. Someway. Please let me get pregnant for myself. Well here comes the tears again.. I will do my best to update more later.